Posted by: medicblog999 | March 12, 2010

Sometimes its just……

moonSometimes this job sucks!

Yup, you heard me right. I know I am usually Mr positive, but sometimes this job makes you question yourself and your abilities like only a few other professions could ever compare with.

Sometimes you want to do your very best for a patient, but it turns out to be one of those jobs where things just don’t go the patient’s way. It doesn’t matter what you do or how good you are, some things are just never going to change the outcome.

Then there are the times where things just don’t work. You try and try but, if it has the chance to go wrong, it will. You don’t make mistakes, but things just seem harder than they should be. Things dont go smoothly like normally and it seems as though everything is put in your path to stop you doing what you know is needed.

And then there are the times that you are left with nothing but just questions.

Did I do enough?

Should I have done something different?

Should I have stopped or should I have carried on?

………Did I fail my patient?

Sometimes, as I sit on station, or drive home, or try to get to sleep, the questions come. I know that nothing would have made a difference but sometime, just sometimes, I wonder………

It hasn’t been a good night.

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Responses

  1. *hugs* I soooooo remember those nights and a few calls still bring those questions when I think about them even now, 10 years after I've left EMS as a career .

  2. You will always be your own worst critic. We've all been there.

  3. Head up mate. I know that when you're feeling like that, it's hard to see the other side, but think about how much more powerful the feeling is when beat the odds and save that person's life. I find it far outweighs the crappy calls.Every single person in the world has a time. If that was theirs, it doesn't matter how much you do, even if it's all 100% appropriate, skillful and correct – they're not going to have any of it. I know that no one's words really help when you're feeling like that, but try and bear a few of them in mind.

  4. Indeed the 'what if's can start to swirl after a rough run or erven the most straight forward of transfers. We try to tell ourselves we did everything we could but sometimes our guidelines or protocols fail us and don't let us do everything we want to for our patients.But I have worked with you and know you have no reason to worry. Your stress is flowing INTO your work, not FROM it in my opinion. All this travelling has made a mark on us and our families.Question not your patient care, my friend.

  5. I realize we really don't know each other and we've had, at best, spurious contact through an electronic medium but I feel safe in saying that your patient was very fortunate in having you as their care provider. We all critique our selves, we all ask “why” all too often. At simply a sign that you are great at what you do and that you truly care for your patients and aren't just going through the motions.

  6. Thanks for the support guys!I know I will be fine and will just move on again, but I guess you all know what its like to have one of those patients!Thanks again.

  7. Head up mate. I know that when you're feeling like that, it's hard to see the other side, but think about how much more powerful the feeling is when beat the odds and save that person's life. I find it far outweighs the crappy calls.Every single person in the world has a time. If that was theirs, it doesn't matter how much you do, even if it's all 100% appropriate, skillful and correct – they're not going to have any of it. I know that no one's words really help when you're feeling like that, but try and bear a few of them in mind.

  8. Indeed the 'what if's can start to swirl after a rough run or erven the most straight forward of transfers. We try to tell ourselves we did everything we could but sometimes our guidelines or protocols fail us and don't let us do everything we want to for our patients.But I have worked with you and know you have no reason to worry. Your stress is flowing INTO your work, not FROM it in my opinion. All this travelling has made a mark on us and our families.Question not your patient care, my friend.

  9. I realize we really don't know each other and we've had, at best, spurious contact through an electronic medium but I feel safe in saying that your patient was very fortunate in having you as their care provider. We all critique our selves, we all ask “why” all too often. At simply a sign that you are great at what you do and that you truly care for your patients and aren't just going through the motions.

  10. Thanks for the support guys!I know I will be fine and will just move on again, but I guess you all know what its like to have one of those patients!Thanks again.

  11. […] @UKMedic999: New blog post: Sometimes its just…… http://999medic.com/2010/03/12/sometimes-its-just/ […]

  12. […] Sometimes being an EMS just sucks. (Medic 999) […]


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