Posted by: medicblog999 | April 8, 2009

Its a strange bubble we live in

dinner_table_and_chairs

As I have mentioned before, my lovely wife, Mrs Medic999 is also a paramedic in the same service as me. We have been together for over 5 years and we obviously share our experiences and support each other through the tough times.

I have noticed over the years that this is not an uncommon thing. New staff join the service and after a short while their relationships which they had prior to joining the service start to get into trouble and then eventually they begin relationships in the service. I know a good few married couples, who this happened to. I think this happens for a variety of reasons, one of which is that when you go home after a bad job or a tough day, sometimes you want to talk about it. I know many relationships and marriages, when one side is not in the job, can cope with this, but some cant. Some people don’t want to hear what we have been dealing with. Some people are quite happy to imagine that really bad things don’t happen on a daily basis to really nice people.

Anyway, as I mentioned in my last post, I haven’t been the best hubby recently, so I made sure that Mrs Medic999`s dinner was waiting on the table for her when she came in from work. We all sat down together and I proceeded to ask the usual question:

M999: So babe, how was your day?

MrsM999: Had a great job, really nasty one.
(If you aren’t medical or a paramedic, this may sound a bit crass, but if you are you know that this means that she had the opportunity to actually practice the advanced skills that she has instead of taxi`ing inappropriate callers to A&E)

We then proceeded to have an in-depth discussion about what she had dealt with, what she had seen, and how it made her feel…..whilst sitting having our meal, at the table.

As I said, what a strange bubble we live in, but I wouldn’t change it for the world.

Mrs Medic999 hasn’t been a Paramedic for very long (about 9 months!) but I am so proud of her and what a fab paramedic she already is!

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Responses

  1. That seems to be common of all emergency services, it not uncommon for my parents to discuse what they have delt with (police) at dinner and they wonder why i dont wanna enter the police force. Oh yeah and its my step dad thanks to job

  2. I agree. I went through a very messy divorce a few years ago. “My wife doesn’t understand me,” was exactly how I felt. I was never able to discuss jobs, and was usually greeted at the door with “How many people have you killed today?”

    BUT: not all non-medics are like that – I remarried, and Mrs RRD is absolutely fab, listens to every case that I need to discuss with her. She’s a photographer, nothing at all to do with medicine.

  3. My previous partner couldn’t handle my Mountain Rescue stuff – it didn’t cause us to break up, but it was just one more straw on the camel.

    My current partner is a Special Constable, and understands *perfectly* why I do it. He’s always interested in the medical side and as a result, it’s great – I can come home and rant and discuss with him. The phrase he uses to describe us both us “interventionists” – we step in. Help. Make a difference. We’re not bystanders.

    Cheers,
    Aled.

  4. That is absolutely true. I haven’t been working in A&E long, and my boyfriend has no idea (or interest) in the NHS, so I am finding it increasingly difficult to talk about day to day work related issues. But then my brother is a police officer, so I can usually give him a ring and have a long discussion about both our jobs. We have plenty of things to moan about!

    We’ll see how long me and the other half last…

  5. Hi Medic999
    Happy easter to you and your family, and readers,
    Hubby and I met while we were both training as learning disabilities nurses, previously had been in different relationships, 29yrs marriage later still together!
    Take care
    joan

  6. I hope I’m putting the kiss of death on my own relationship but I’ve been happily married for 12 years and my wife works in a busy MAU at the loacl hospital. We have 4 great kids. Although we did go throw a brief break up 8 years ago (we only had 2 kids then). After getting back together I really needed to evaluate what direction my life was headed so I joined the ambulance service and have never looked back. It was just what we needed. We had another 2 kids and couldn’t be happier. We chat about certain jobs and have the usual ups and downs but on the whole things couldn’t be better. But I have to agree, at work every one (all bar a few) seem to be splitting up left, right and centre. Then you find that they are seeing either fellow ambulance staff, hospital staff or police officers. Strange old world.

  7. Oops, sorry that should of read. I hope I’m NOT putting the kiss of death on my relationship. Doh and double Doh!

    • Mac,
      I was wondering what you were trying to say!!!!

      Lol!

  8. Its funny – I started to read a couple of “paramedic” blogs when my other half was training to be an ambulance tech. I wanted to understand your world so that I could be their to support and listen to the stories. This i did, often through the night – especially in the early days – and was genuinely interested.

    Unfortunatley – after 12 years of being together and 8 weeks after our son was born – I discovered he was having an affiar with someone from work and he walked out.

    So where does that fit in the strange bubble you live in?

    Still strangle additced to the blogs though! LOL!

    • Sorry you had such a nasty experience and after you tried to become part of that world to!
      Maybe you could turn all your effort into a benefit and become a paramedic too?


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