(I apologise if this reads like a pat on the back to myself – maybe it is, but I think I need it at the minute!)
It’s no secret that over the past few weeks I have been reconsidering my future and where I want to be in the next part of career. I have been looking at a variety of opportunities both inside and outside of the Ambulance Service.
Something has changed, and I am not sure what it is, but since I wrote my ‘Itchy Feet’ post, things just haven’t been the same.
Maybe it is just the run of stupidly busy shifts; the constant barrage of ‘patients’ with no apparent illness or injury that warrants going to hospital, never mind calling an emergency ambulance, or just that I am feeling very tired.
I’m sure some of it has to do with Mrs999s injury, and the concerns I now have of coming to work and having a split second incident which could jeapordise my career and earning potential.
However, as I sit here at my laptop at 05:11 in the morning, I have that familiar feeling of satisfaction.
That feeling of knowing that I have just made a difference. I have done what I have been trained to do, but more than that, I did it my way. (no not like that!)
My way is to work quickly, effectively and efficiently; caring for the family as well as the patient; looking at the bigger picture, and taking all the information in to make quick and decisive decisions.
Assessing and re-assessing.
Cannulating, administering medication, interpreting subtle ECG changes at a glance and feeling confident in my diagnosis.
Deciding on the destination of my patient based on my provisional diagnosis.
Holding a hand, and reassuring a patient and their loved one.
14 minutes on scene.
A hug from a grateful son and a thank you from a patient who is a long way from being out of the woods, but who I had real concerns about even getting to the hospital alive.
It feels good.
It reminds me why I love this job.
Is it enough??
I don’t know……..